10 Pop Culture Trends of 2008 That Need to Stop

A lot happened in 2008. And a lot happened in 2008 that needs to stop happening. 

Some of my inimitable colleagues on Twitter weighed in with some excellent initial suggestions that helped to shape this list, including the following:

@glitchngrowl: "Asymmetrical haircuts, white belts, uggs, crocs, 90's knock offs (original issue is where it counts), gabba, printed hoodies" (see #5)

@arjunbasu: "Hip-hop hand gestures from white people. The 70s and 80s. The death of network television. Cynicism as irony. Fashion cues/grooming from porn." (see #5)

@sleepingpoet: "Bird and tree imagery... It's getting tired." (see #10)

But, fear not, gentle reader.

Don't be offended if you happen to be an offender, there are still a few days left to correct your course, re-name your band, and come out of retirement!

Top 10 Pop Culture Trends of 2008 That Must Stop:

10. The New Naturalism (or Again with the Gothic Redux?)
2008 was full of earthy expressions of a 'new naturalism' that, er, took root in art, music, fashion, and culture, drew inspiration from 19th century Gothic sources, and featured everything from crystal and animal band names to fashion styles and jewelry variously adorned, imprinted, or emblazoned with birds, skulls, wings, branches, eagles, wolves, leaves, horns, feathers, trees, unicorns, and insects. We would be wise to heed the wisdom of the great naturalist poet himself, H.D. Thoreau, who warned: "Beware of all enterprises that require a new set of clothes" (especially those that happen to feature silkscreened images of swords and ravens). Fie Nature, be gone!
Main offenders: Urban Outfitters, Givenchy, Robert Geller, unicorn band merch-makers, and all of those "animal" and "crystal bands", and many others, I'm sure (but you know who you are).
 
9. Social Media "Experts"
From MrTweet to the rest of the digerati, everyone with more than a handful of friends of Facebook and a regularly updated microblog came out of the ether in 2008 to declare their expertise in the emerging realms of digital and social media. But simply gettin' social with your media does not make you an expert on social media. Perhaps a little background reading might be in order?
Main offenders: everyone with a Twitter account, the Shorty Awards

8. Holograms
CNN decided to up the technological ante for its US election coverage this year by having Wolf Blitzer conduct Star Wars-inspired interviews with holographic projections of reporters and celebrities. This news gaffe and tech gimmick looked silly and was laughably ridiculous. Leave the holograms to Princess Leia, guys.
Main offenders: CNN, Jessica Yellin, will.i.am

7. Auto-Tune
This audio software plug-in — variously known as a "vocoder" or that "Cher robot effect" —  automatically corrects the pitch of singers who can't sing. Not surprisingly, nearly every pop singer in 2008 over-used it to horrific effect. We've even compiled the most annoying examples of the year (don't worry, you can thank me later). And when T-Pain is calling for the trend to end, you know it should have died a very long time ago.
Main Offenders: Kanye West, T-Pain, Lil' Wayne, Akon, Chris Brown

6. The New Facebook
Before it was launched, as soon as it was launched, and every day since, users of the social networking site have spoken loudly with a singular voice, asking "How Do I Go Back to the Old Facebook?"
Main offender: Facebook

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Paul McCartney in Shrek 4

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5. Hipster Critiques of Hipsters (or 'Cynicism as Irony')
Whether declaring the end of hipsterdom or complaining about hipsters' complaints about complaining about hipsterdom, new depths of navel-gazing blog-induced pop cultural cynicism were reached in 2008. But, like, whatever.
Main offenders: Now Magazine, Adbusters, P0YKPAC

4. The End of Analog Media
In the ever-increasing race to all-consuming digitality a few more reels of analog tape and film were put to rest this year. The only thing left to ask is, If vinyl records can have a resurgence, can other media as well?  
Main offenders: Polaroid, VHS, DVD (well, not quite, but soon enough, right?)

3. Musicals
Despite appearances to the contrary, not everything needs to be turned into a musical...or, er...an "ice show".
Main offenders: Shrek, Star Wars, Jerry Springer, High School Musical

2. Endurance Stunts as "Magic"
When your incredible endurance stunt is hanging upside down, but you take frequent standing-up breaks, and when your culminating "Dive of Death" disappearing act turns out to be a little more than a boring 'bounce of meh' into the night....well then, my friends, this is no longer "magic" - or especially interesting.  
Main offender: David Blaine

1. Fake Celebrity Retirements
Actors, rappers, musicians, and celebrities came out in droves this year to declare their retirement from their primary professions to pursue other interests. The only thing is, nobody believes them. We know you're not going anywhere, guys. Just come on back and play nice with the other kids. Don't worry, we'll still give you that attention you crave so much.
Main Offenders: Joaquin Phoenix, Trent Reznor, M.I.A., The Roots, Lupe Fiasco, Angelina Jolie, Kanye West

[ For more year-end lists and 'best of' picks check out NowPublic's Best of 2008 channel.]

Runners Up:

• Dayglow club kids
• American Apparel
• Declaring the death of print media and/or television
• Pretending that you "get" Lil' Wayne
  

What else did we forget? Let me know!