Aniston: John Mayer's Twitter Addiction Caused Heartbreak Warfare

As we told you last week, John Mayer is the Jack Handey of Twitter. But no amount of emotive, Hallmark card-worthy status updates could save him from the heartbreak warfare wrought by his microblogging twiddiction.

In this particularly zeitgeisty instance, Jennifer Aniston, Mayer's former flame/former Friend and seeming luddite of 2.0 proportions, was apparently insensed and upset with the fact that she could no longer get a hold of said e-boyfriend using such ancient and outmoded means of prehistoric communication as cellular telephone technology and electronic mail.

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No, her beloved was too "busy" posting witticisms and asking his beloved cult of Twitter followers to share 6 word short stories to pick up the phone and answer Jen's calls -- aka he was "working".

Now of course, fellow Tweet addicts would know that all Jenny Jen needed to do to secure her place in her boyfriend's lifestreamed-consciousness would be to follow the lead of Ashton & Demi, Erykah & Jay, or even Spencer & Heidi and get herself her very own free Twitter account.

Surely, the way to a man's digital heart is through his DMs and @ replies.