Chris Brown and Rihanna's Young Fans Deserve Better Role Models

Chris Brown and Rihanna are topping the shock-news headlines again.  Chris Brown appeared in an LA court March 5, 2009 to answer charges that he brutal assaulted girlfriend Rihanna after a pre-Grammy night argument turned violent.

In the very brief court appearance Brown was charged with two felony counts; felony assault and uttering of criminal threats.  He was also ordered to stay away from his victim.

Chris Brown did not speak at the hearing and instead let his lawyers do the talking.  Lawyers for Rihanna, who was only ever identified as Ms. Fenty, were also in court to make statements in support of Brown.

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After the charges were entered lawyers for Chris Brown asked that his arraignment be postponed until April 6, 2009 and submitted a motion that the LA District attorney could no longer make their case.  The primary impetus to prosecuting Chris Brown is the victim (never formally identified as Rihanna) who stated in court that she would not testify.

Brown reportedly kicked, punched and bit Rihanna leaving her disoriented and nearly unconscious near a rental vehicle he was driving.  Witnesses called police and Chris Brown fled the scene.  The R&B star turned himself in to LA police hours later without incident.

Since Chris Brown assaulted girlfriend Rihanna the two young stars have behaved in a way that dating violence counselors will tell you is very normal.  The cycle of violence is well known and well understood by those who work with the issue of dating violence.

The cycle of violence often plays out like this:

• The violent incident occurs and outsiders report it to police
  
• The victim retreats to the support of family and friends but remains quiet and introspective
• The abuser lashes out looking to justify his/her violence and lay blame on the victim
• The abuser is confronted with clear evidence of the severity of his/her abuse
  
• The abuser feels guilty and seeks to make amends, acting very nice and promising to change
  
• The victim is torn between feelings of attachment toward their abuser and confusion over what has happened, sometimes the victim accepts some of the blame
• The victim accepts the apologies and gestures of his/her abuser and the pair reunite
• The victim does not cooperate with authorities and even tries to protect the abuser

The Chris Brown and Rihanna domestic abuse cycle has mirrored this text book progression.

• Chris Brown assaults Rihanna, and leaves the scene after witnesses call police
• Rihanna goes into hiding and is sheltered by her family, she cancels all public appearances including her 21st birthday celebrations, reports begin to surface that she is not talking to police
• Conflicting reports surface about the cause of the fight, most theories of the cause look to blame the victim
  
• Reports surface that Chris Brown posted a personal attack against Rihanna on his Facebook page after changing his status to single, Brown later denies that he was behind the Facebook update
• Chris Brown begins talking about his childhood in which he witnessed his mother being abused
• TMZ releases shocking photos revealing the full extent of Rihanna's injuries
• Chris Brown and Rihanna reportedly have a tearful reunion in which he begs her for her forgiveness and showers her with gifts, Brown vows to get help from God and emerge a better man
• News of a reconciliation between the pair intensifies, rumors of a wedding begin to circulate on the Internet
• The reconciliation is confirmed when Rihanna asks the courts NOT to impose a protection order barring contact between her and Chris Brown after charges are announced
  
• Rihanna announces that she will not testify against Chris Brown, prosecutors are forced to re-examine the strength of their case without her testimony

Abusers are not simply evil people, and victims are not weak, but the only way to break the cycle is with serious counseling.  This rarely occurs when a couple reunites quickly after an incident. 

To break the cycle of violence abusers and victims should get counseling individually and stay apart while getting help.  They need to grow healthy alone before they should ever consider getting back together.

It is too easy to say Chris Brown is a terrible person and Rihanna is stupid for standing behind him.  Domestic violence is a complex issue and many times victimizers are also victims themselves.  This appears to be the case for Brown who has often referenced his mother's abuse.  He is a victim of the cycle of violence as surely as Rihanna is a victim of his violence.

The saddest part of this story is not that these two young people are struggling with a legacy of domestic violence, it isn't even that their private pain is playing out in the public arena.  The saddest thing is that they are keeping the cycle of violence alive by not seeking help alone before coming back together.

The example this sets for their young fans is tragic.  Rihanna is not alone, many young girls share her physical and emotional pain.  Chris Brown is also not alone, many young men are victims of the same cycle of violence. 

Chris Brown and Rihanna had a shot at showing their fans how to overcome domestic violence in the most healthy and constructive way possible and in that they have failed.  Their young and impressionable fans deserve better.

Get the most up to date information on the Chris Brown and Rihanna domestic assault case at the NowPublic feature channel.