I am GOD! – Growing up (satire)
Today is the day I report the fact that I have become officially an Adult. It's has took me a long time to grow up and since I declared my self to man kind I have played the games children play. When I became more responsible I just observed the game and did not make things more complicated for you mere mortals than they were.
I have seen many interesting things within my creation where as on many planets there have been many wars in my name and many of my creation destroyed complete civilization some even blew their whole planets up.
You humans have been some interest to me as your scientifically minded are at the very doorstep of working out that I have been playing games with your civilization. However my trusty followers have been so indoctrinated they even seem to be blind to my evil side. Yes I was a very nasty brat in my earlier years.
Now is the time to change my ways and stop all the deception that I actual listen to prayer and I want people to join me in my domain in the heavens after you are dead. Sorry that was all a big lie as you are all programmed to die and that there is no soul that lives on.
I am sorry to tell you that I am also the Devil that many of my followers so fear. Any way what I am going to do to put that to rights is the following:
1. Take a way your ability to be evil.
2. Control your environment so no natural calamities can take place.
3. Rid you of any religious indoctrination you may have received.
4. Get rid of the angels I created when I was a lazy brat
Human kind deserve to live peacefully in a new utopia as you and many other creatures have gave me something to do whilst growing up now I promise to be a better responsible God of whom you can talk face to face with when troubled.
Oh yes! for all those that wonder how I am created when I grow old and cease to exist I am reborn to start a new creation.