Missile Command Movie: Not a Joke
Fox Secures Rights to Atari's Missile Command for Movie Adaptation
20th Century Fox is adapting the Atari classic Missile Command into a movie. This is not a joke. Well, the news is not a joke, but I understand if you have trouble taking this seriously.
The idea of a Missile Command movie has most film writers scratching their heads, as the game has no narrative to speak of. You shoot at missiles, planes and satellites until your eventual demise.
Unbowed by the fact that lots of movies have already been made that involve missiles and aircraft getting shot down, Burk Sharpless and Matt Sazama are saddled with screenplay duties.
What irks me most about this isn't that Missile Command is a crappy launching point for a movie (which I think it definitely is). The worst part is, with this monstrosity in the pipeline, other movies get pushed off the schedule, which may only mean a delay, but may also mean the death of a project. In this fickle industry, time is the killer of unmade films.
But what the hell, right? Let's look at some other video games that should get made into movies of they're going to go with Missile Command:
- Moon Patrol (catchy tune, a gun that shoots both forward and up)
- Altered Beast
- Arkanoid (will appeal to BackBerry Brick Breaker fans)
- Q*Bert (hell, it's already been a cartoon)
- Burger Time (like Diner, only not)
- Super Mario Bros (oh... wait)
- Centipede (that was mean, and I apologize)
Couldn't you at least find something with a little plot to it? I mean hell, even the original Mario Bros. had depth to it.
Yeah, so this is happening. Maybe we can get Nathan Fillion in this one, so everyone can shut up about the Uncharted movie. Maybe he can play a missile or something.
Hey, the rights to Asteroids and Rollercoaster Tycoon have also been snapped up. Perhaps Atari's key to success lies in its past, and not in its future.
Meanwhile, if you're jonesing for Missile Command, then go play Missile Command. It's free on Atari's website.