Punish the Suicidal Instead of Helping Them

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Have you ever been woken by a home invasion? Flashlight in your face as you turn over, naked, in bed, after an hour of trying to sleep?

i made the mistake of sharing my day with friends and family. The day included the 180 degree flip flopping of a girl i was seeing. Cold, heartless, antipathy seething from the telephone after a week of being ignored. i went for a ride, sitting still, in my car, in the garage, closed up, for about 1.5 hours. Car windows open and laying somewhat comfortably.

Well, i changed my mind, too. 180. i shut off the engine and went back into the house to care for my cats, prepare for bed and try to sleep off the negative emotions greater intensity (intensity can be reduced, but not the experience itself).

Still, before i went to bed, i emailed friends and family. You'd be amazed, maybe, at the responses. Some were tearful, but most were ... judgmental. The worst part... my catastrophist father contacted "crisis intervention" and 302ed me. (you might want to look up 201, 302 and 304 in regards to "hospitalization").

i lost 12 days of freedom (what freedom i had, being on disability, without enough income to do the things independent adults do... the things i used to do when i had a career, with a decent (not great, but decent) income, benefits (of sorts), social acceptance (from my clients and coworkers but not my sociopathic manager). i was given medications to make me "normal" and "adjusted." Medications i was not willing to be pushed and coerced into taking because i have several doctors i am already working with outside the "asylum" ... outside the prison of the "Behavioral Health" system.

After the legal battle of the 302 to 304 laws, which legally take away some of your constitutional rights, they won and i gave up. i GAVE UP my life and my fight to be an individual because they legally removed my rights from me, despite the fact that i had dealt with my crisis on my own.

That's enough about me... it's time for the important part of the article:

The Angry and Truthful Satire

Instead of asking ourselves how we contributed to the choice of self termination (or how we complacently did nothing - how we maybe could have helped prevent it, as a society, in general), let's call them sick and selfish! Let us, in our arrogance and antipathy, rush them along to the end! (Joe calls this the "Feeding Frenzy: people don't kick people WHEN they're down, they kick them BECAUSE they're down.")

The Angry Truth

What if everything that makes you who you is taken from you? What if your every waking and sleeping moment is filled with memories of rejection, harassment, abuse, or feeling as though you're never allowed to just plain be a part of society? How effing righteous would you really be when all you can remember is cold, heartless disinterest or outright cruelty? See what choices YOU make when you have only ONE left that offers relief.

But no, we don't accept suicide as an option. No sir, not in this nation. Suicide is selfish and stupid. Just like abortion is selfish and stupid. Just like being vegetarian is stupid and pointless. Suicide isn't painless, but maybe more people need to LISTEN TO ACTUAL SUICIDAL PEOPLE; practice EMPATHY! Discover why suicide becomes hope for relief.

Hell, people still don't even believe in Asperger's Syndrome. Comprehending suicide as freedom is even more difficult to grasp.

disturbed (a "short summary" of what disturbs me about this world)
"Google" search "suicide" (go to "Read This First")

References

Here's a PERFECT excerpt from the above "Read This First" page:

"Start by considering this statement:

“Suicide is not chosen; it happens when pain exceeds resources for coping with pain.”

That’s all it’s about. You are not a bad person, or crazy, or weak, or flawed, because you feel suicidal. It doesn’t even mean that you really want to die - it only means that you have more pain than you can cope with right now. If I start piling weights on your shoulders, you will eventually collapse if I add enough weights... no matter how much you want to remain standing. Willpower has nothing to do with it. Of course you would cheer yourself up, if you could.

Don’t accept it if someone tells you, “that’s not enough to be suicidal about.” There are many kinds of pain that may lead to suicide. Whether or not the pain is bearable may differ from person to person. What might be bearable to someone else, may not be bearable to you. The point at which the pain becomes unbearable depends on what kinds of coping resources you have. Individuals vary greatly in their capacity to withstand pain.

When pain exceeds pain-coping resources, suicidal feelings are the result. Suicide is neither wrong nor right; it is not a defect of character; it is morally neutral. It is simply an imbalance of pain versus coping resources.

You can survive suicidal feelings if you do either of two things: (1) find a way to reduce your pain, or (2) find a way to increase your coping resources. Both are possible." - © Copyright 1995-2006 Martha Ainsworth. All rights reserved.

1. My reduction of pain, or attempts thereof, have been to seek to understand people better so as to work with them better. i tried my damned hardest to harmonize at work with a sociopath who was impossible to please.

2. My attempts at increasing my coping mechanisms have been through art and other solitary activities. These no longer work because the big issue is isolation and loneliness. So i have sought companionship (from females, in a romantic sense). Somehow, i manage to locate just the right people who say all the right things to me up front... and become someone else later. They blame ME for their changed attitude like the mason blames the stone.

Final Remarks

i dare all psychiatrists to take a ride through the 304 system. Know what you're doing to your patients. Experience it.