Culture

Rappers Lose the Bling as Recession Approaches

by Jarrett Martineau | October 29, 2008 at 02:20 pm

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The glory days of rap's pre-millienial, blinged-out excesses are done and dusted.

There's no more money in the music biz, so it's time for today's hip-hop artists vying for VH1 honors to unchain themselves from their over-indulgent penchant for shiny pendants.

And I hope that Pharrell, Lil Wayne, T-Pain, 50 Cent, Slick Rick and other pro-bling rappers are paying attention.

Another hip-hop jewelry auction might be the only way to save their souls and pocketbooks.

All the gold ropes and gold teeth have got to go. You need to trade them in for cash and then hold on to it. Stuff it in those high-tops until the banks are safe again. No more shopping sprees. No more Hummers. No more Cristal. Back to basics, folks. You are not immune. Your record label could go belly-up like Lehman Brothers did, and you may find yourself standing behind Joe the Plumber at the check-cashing joint.

Yes, you’ve all come a long way from the days of Mr. T-level bling, but you’ve got many more miles to go. Pull off the gold chains and bring on the humility. Get yourself a Prius. Carpool to the next VH1 Rap Honors show. Recycle those kicks instead of tossing them after the first scuff mark.