There is nothing more frightening than ignorance in action

by mabone | July 11, 2008 at 05:19 pm

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When do we finally accept our circumstances. When is it clear that the choice is ours and ours alone to pick up the pieces or fade to black.
When I was 29 my older brother was killed by a drunk driver, when I was 35 my youngest brother passed from self inflicted punishment. When I was 48 my deceased brothers youngest son took his life. When fifty came around my father died in 90 days of diagnosis from Colon Cancer. In the last 3 years I have had 3 spinal surgeries to fuse a total of 9 disks in my neck and back. My injuries have cost me my friends, my marriage, and to a large degree my sanity. You know there really isnt a pill for despair or loneliness. Why are we so encouraged to take medications that allow us to be "fine" with our personal drama's. My doctor is convinced Im bi-polar because I share with him my hopes and aspirations for change and recovery, and he cant understand why I wont take medications for depression. Well i did for 2 years...every damn one of them it seemed. Plus, an array of pain medications, muscle relaxers, anxiety meds, etc. He was convinced when I stopped that my life would be a train wreck in weeks.
Six months ago, i stopped all pharmaceuticals and opted to try cannabis for calmly moving forward with rehab and of course a new lifestyle of being a disabled american. The cloud of narcotics such as methadone, Perco(anything), or hydrocodone are ridiculous for moving forward with any kind of therapy. Yeah, there fun for a while, if you dont need them. But if you must take heavy meds for stability, pretty soon you cant even go grocery shopping without eating a handful of poppies. its necessary, but its still crap !
Big money tobacco, and big money Pharma will fight the issue of medical marijuana just like big money "oil" will fight with lobbyists who get paid to humiliate MMJ patients for choosing a drug embraced by every generation living on the earth today. I am sick and tired of people saying AIDS patients need to worry about lung issues rather than daily pain or terminal cancer patients who are experiencing dramatic symptoms due to lack of appetite and nausea.
Im a dad of three great kids, self employed all my adult life and now I find myself working on a new "gig" just trying to find my way at 51.
What have you done "today" to live up to your potential ?

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