Don’t Be a Dude Yamaha: A Gripping Story of Life and Death in Silicon Valley

Dude
Yamaha is a venture capitalist. But Dude Yamaha isn’t his real name.
Perhaps I’ll save that for the book. Or perhaps I’ll forever keep it a
secret… one known only to Wilford, myself, and a few super-savvy code
breakers!

I once thought it’d be years before I wrote this story. But those
around me – many of whom know Dude personally – kept bothering me to
get it out the door. “It’s a story that needs to be written,” a
colleague of his recently said.

For the sake of Dude’s reputation, and perhaps for fear of
retribution, I’ve changed (encoded) all names and relevant details
about his life. But if you really want to know who he is, just email me
and I’ll send you his name and a compromising picture.

******

A few months ago, Wilford and I traveled to Silicon Valley to meet
with top venture capital firms. We had scheduled four follow-up
meetings with top-ten venture capital firms in the Valley. Dude’s firm,
Basement Tek Ventures, was the fifth meeting… not a follow-up meeting,
and not a top-ten firm.

The four follow-up meetings went extremely well. Wilford and I
diligently prepare for everything, and though I have the tendency to
drop the F-bomb every now and then, the higher-ups don’t seem to mind.
One group of partners called us “compelling founders”, and another
group of partners called our technology “crazy” and “potentially
groundbreaking”.

We walked into Basement Tek Ventures with a lot of confidence.
Introductory venture capital meetings had tended for us to be smooth
meet-and-greets with just enough substance for us and the partners to
decide whether we wanted to take our discussions to the next level. But
such cordiality was not meant to be with Dude. As it turned out, Dude
was very undudely.

At first glance, he didn’t appear intimidating. He was rounded,
jolly, wore sandals, and kept his backpack nearby. “Hi, I’m Dude,” he
said. Wilford and I shook his hands and handed him our business cards.
“I didn’t bring one,” he said.

Soon after, his partners BreathofFreshAir and AnotherBreath walked
into the room. We exchanged handshakes and business cards, and the
meeting was underway.

But Wilford couldn’t turn on the projector for a quick (and fun)
introductory presentation. He had been successful manipulating tens of
other projectors – as well every piece of technology he’s ever touched
– but this projector wouldn’t work. “I want you to know that this
reflects very badly on you,” Dude said, not joking. “I’d prefer that
you skip the presentation and just show us this revolutionary
technology BreathofFreshAir has told me about.”

“Actually, I think a presentation would help, Dude,”
BreathofFreshAir said. “These guys provide an important backdrop for
their ideas.”

“Whatever,” Dude said.

I introduced the technology and the business, and tried to keep the
discussion quick and light (funny). It was an introduction that had
captivated many others, and seemed to captivate BreathofFreshAir and
AnotherBreath… but seemed only to agitate Dude… who checked his e-mail
and sighed often throughout a barely endurable 180 seconds.

“Can we get to the technology now?”

Wilford opened his computer and put a demo of the technology on the
screen. Before Wilford could utter much more than a sentence, Dude
said, “Do you really think a mere mortal would use this?”

We explained that what he was looking at was very similar to a user
interface developed by his former employer, Pear, Inc., which had been
used successfully by tens of millions of people.

“Whatever,” he said.

Wilford started showing more of the technology, but fifteen seconds
later, he was stopped again. “So who, in their right minds would use
something like this?” Dude asked.

We explained that though we had conceived of new and better ways to
organize and synthesize data, our technology applications were
mainstream, easy-to-use, and market-validated. We gave many use-case
examples. Then we tried to move on…

“I don’t buy it,” he said. “Do you really believe that people use
the Internet to connect with one another?” We gave examples of numerous
online communities – dating, social, and work-related – where that was
the case. “I don’t buy it,” he said. Then we tried to move on…

“I don’t buy it,” he said. “Do you really believe that
community-generated information is better than information generated by
experts? We cited research and gave examples of online communities such
as Wikipedia, where the information generated by users has been proven
to be better than information generated by experts. “I don’t buy it,”
he said. Then we tried to move on…

But there was no moving on. Dude had had enough. “It takes a lot to
make a venture capitalist say no… I mean a lot… but this is an awful
business idea and a waste of time.”

And then things got interesting. “Do you really think it’s an awful
idea?” BreathofFreshAir asked. “I mean, look at the possibilities!”
Dude listened. BreathofFreshAir and AnotherBreath talked. “Sure it’s
different, but so were Microsoft and Google… and Wikipedia!”

Dude didn’t have any patience. He stood up and said, “Fine! If you
guys want to outvote me and do the deal, then do it. I don’t care. But
I’ve had enough and I think this is crap. I really have to go.” He
grabbed his backpack and left the room.

BreathofFreshAir and AnotherBreath apologized profusely on his
behalf. But they didn’t want to leave. “Let’s talk about this,”
AnotherBreath said. And though we all knew that a deal wasn’t in the
cards – Dude calls the shots at Basement Tek Ventures – we had a
wonderful time talking!

*****

In fairness to Dude… he may be right. When Wilford and I launch Avanoo in a

month or so, it might not be as sweet as we (and a growing number of alpha users) think it is.

But I didn’t write this article to disprove Dude Yamaha… Only time and a cool-as-hell product can do that!

Rather, I wrote it to warn you about people like Dude – people who
have achieved success through inheritance, luck, or yesterday’s toolkit
– who then seek to put down those who don’t share their ideas…

These “Dudes” have been dangerous throughout history – they’re the
ones who jailed Columbus, came down really fucking hard on Galileo, and
told Edison that it wasn’t worth the effort trying to invent the light
bulb. Sure, they may have been right about others who ultimately
failed, but think of the world today without light!

One of the world’s most respected physicists, Max Planck, once said,
“A new scientific truth does not triumph by convincing its opponents
and making them see the light, but rather because its opponents
eventually die and a new generation grows up that is familiar with it.”

And if Max is right, then he teaches us how to deal with the Dude
Yamahas of the world, whose egos drive them to try to squash our dreams
and inspirations. Don’t take anything the Dudes say to heart! Instead,
when they speak, smile and know that eventually they’ll die. They all
do!