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"Danger: Avoid Death"
I knew I was forgetting to avoid something.
DETROIT - Here are some words to live by, from a warning label on a small tractor: "Danger: Avoid Death."That warning is the winner of the 11th annual "Wacky Warning Label Contest," sponsored by Michigan Lawsuit Abuse Watch. The contest is part of an effort to show the effects of lawsuits on warning labels.
Kevin Soave of Farmington Hills, a Detroit suburb, won the $500 grand prize for submitting the tractor's "Danger: Avoid Death" label.
The $250 second place prize went to Carrianne, Jacob and Robby Turin of Greensburg, Pennsylvania, for a label they found on an iron-on T-shirt transfer that warns: "Do not iron while wearing shirt."
Richard Goodnow of Lancaster, Massachusetts, earned the $100 third-place prize for a label on a baby stroller featuring a small storage pouch that warns: "Do not put child in bag."
Contest organizer Bob Dorigo Jones says the silly labels reflect how broken the U.S. civil justice system is.
"Predatory lawyers know they can file ridiculous lawsuits against innocent product makers and blackmail them into a cash settlement - even in cases in which a user has ignored common sense," Dorigo Jones said in a statement Wednesday.
Honourable mention went to Cyndi LaMonde of Traverse City for a label on a letter opener that says: "Caution: Safety goggles recommended."
Ann Marie Young of Fillmore, N.Y., took the second honourable mention for a warning she found which cautions users: "The Vanishing Fabric Marker should not be used as a writing instrument for signing checks or any legal documents."
The group selected a list of finalists and listeners of WOMC-FM's Dick Purtan show chose the winners.
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Most RecentMost Recommended Comments (11)
at 14:05 on December 12th, 2007
Pair this wine with some Fat Bastard and you've got a winning combination!
at 14:09 on December 12th, 2007
My favorite of all time is the label found on children's superhero Halloween costumes: "Cape does not enable wearer to fly". Everybody knows that Superman can fly because he's an alien, not because he has a cape...
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waderat 15:05 on December 12th, 2007
I thought it was funny and rather obvious. Guns don't go in garbage cans...
at 15:35 on December 12th, 2007
Rehab: white chalk made by blind woman
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PXLpainterat 15:48 on December 12th, 2007
I was looiking for some pretty fuckin' hot sauce. Think I found it! ;)
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jeffuwo36at 17:18 on December 12th, 2007
With a name like this, how can you NOT buy it?
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beardenbat 17:48 on December 12th, 2007
The label covers the original product name "Cocaine" which the Feds said they couldn't use for a brand name. They're fighting! I guess obvious from the label.
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Max Mead Cartoonsat 22:28 on December 12th, 2007
See more cartoons at http://www.maxmeadcartoons.com
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wogensat 00:14 on December 13th, 2007
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DoctorSaruat 02:45 on December 13th, 2007
As good as the classic one on a toaster "Warning: Do not immerse in water".
at 03:33 on December 13th, 2007
I think this IKEA sign was originally asking the public to put their 'Tray Here Please' but Try here Peas sounds so much better.