Kaia Gerber Nude for PETA
by Karen Fish
The world is in an uproar today over the pictures of Kaia Gerber, 10, posing in ‘provocative’ photos for ‘Young Versace.’ Kaia Gerber the ‘Gerber Baby’ is the 10 year old daughter of Rande Gerber and famed supermodel Cindy Crawford. The shoot was for the opening of the first ‘Young Versace’ boutique opening in Milan, Italy in an effort to save the sinking Italian economy which is threatening to topple the world economy. Long gone are the days of the Roman Empire which hung Jesus Christ out to dry before building a religion around the Jewish born Rabbi and Messiah of Christianity and Islam.
Last year Egypt toppled Dictator Hosni Mubarak and today Egypt elected a radical Muslim Extremist parliament. The Muslim Botherhood of Al Qaeda head Ayman al Zawahiri won 38% of the seats and the far more radical Al Nour party won 29% giving the hardliners 66.6 % of the vote. The Muslim Brotherhood changed their name in Egypt to the ‘Freedom and Justice Party.’
Asked to comment on the Kaia Gerber Versace photo shoot Freedom and Justice leader Helmy al Gazzar said “This is absolutely traife and dead against Sharia Law. God of Mount Sinai aka Allah aka God the Father, Jesus Christ, The Holy Spirit, Yehovah, Elohim said clearly to the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) in the Holy Koran: “And speak to the believing women that…they throw their veils over their bosoms. (Koran Sura Chapter 24:31). Make War on the Christians, Jews, and Infidels and I will reward you with 72 virgins, crystal clear springs, wine with no side effects, 80,000 servants each and eternal paradise in Heaven with God of Mount Sinai. (Koran Sura 9:5, 29-30, 111 Sura 56, Hadith). It was the Virgins that swept us into power.”
The world is in an uproar over the Kaia Gerber nude ‘Young Versace’ photo shoot pictures but they forget that five years ago when she was 5 years old Kaia posed topless for Melissa Odabash beach wear with a fake tattoo on her lower back. Next on her agenda is the Kaia Gerber nude photo shoot for PETA’s ‘I’d Rather Go Naked than Wear Fur Campaign’ joining other celebrities Sophie Monk, Maggie Q., Joanna Krupa, daughter of Gene Krupa, Eva Mendes, daughter of Segio Mendes, Alicia Silverstone, Jamelia, Pamela Sue Anderson and Callista Gingrich.
Clarence Darrow defended a teacher charged with teaching evolution instead of Creationism. The teacher was convicted despite the fact that human beings and Apes share 99% the same DNA. The difference is that Apes are not smart enough to write Bibles, or poison the world’s water, earth and air, or lock up their fellow apes in cages for wearing the clothing God created them in. If you want to lose weight, when you have a craving for food, eat raw almonds, organic dried cranberries and bananas instead of chicken wings and pizza.
Disclaimer: This article is satire, fictitious. Any resemblance to persons living or dead is entirely coincidental or is intended purely as satire, parody or spoof.