Fake Boobies, Twinkies, Yoo-hoo And The Girl From India

You got to love those big fake boobies of the American woman of the west. California women with their boob jobs, fake lips and their Louis Vuitton handbags amuse me. As these bold, vain and empowered women take their wimpy, doormat, dentist and doctor husbands to divorce court and virtually destroy their hubby'€™s manhood mentally and financially; I am reminded by what appears as the opposite extreme in another part of the world.

In Hyderabad, India, an over zealous alpha male has been arrested and charged with assault for locking up his wife (no fake breasts here) in a room for three years and making her drink her own urine. He did this after she opposed him taking a second wife, the police said.

Asha Begum, the wife of construction foreman Mohammed Shadulla, was chained and held captive in a room with no windows in their home. She had managed to escape when Shadulla accidentally left the door open after cleaning the room.

The staff here at dumpyourwifenow.com has offered to fly the natural breasted Asha to our office, where we not only promise to clean our office up for her, but to lavish her with a Hoo-nami of Yoo-hoo fudgy goodness and our endless supply of Ho-ho'€™s and Twinkies (which have been tinglin taste buds for over 75 years). We will show Asha how wonderfully creamy and delicious these little treats are!

We also offered Mr. Shadulla, the ex-wife of one of our staff writers. It's a humble gesture of our American good will. We know he will take good care of her.

Hopefully Mohammed learned his lesson about cleaning the cell... not to bother.