Anita Tedaldi Gave Away Adopted Child

I think she did the correct thing for her and i commend her for that, for me who is trying to have a child i would do whatever it took to make this work.  Some children depending on their situation may take longer to bond than others and i think a little for time may have made the difference.  Just my opinion.

Thank goodness she bonded with her biological daughters - they would have been harder to put back then the little boy.  She is very lucky to have gotten a warranty with this child.  My children didn't come with a book how to raise them nor a warranty to return them if all wasn't just peaches and cream.  And 18 months sounds like a fair amount of time, not 18 years like the rest of us.  Keep up the good work I am sure there is other children waiting to have a home and family and then not have them any more.

There is no excuse for giving your baby away. She should of thought it through before getting him. That was his his new mom and she abandoned him just like his real mom. The poor child is going to have a complex and think that no one wants him

This is one of the most horrible things I've heard a parent doing.  I am a therapist who works with abused women, most of whom were abused or abandoned in childhood.  She has hurt this child in ways she cannot imagine.  I wonder if she would have given up one of her biological daughters, had she not bonded with them.  I also worry about this idea of a child being disposable or returnable and if it would have been just as easy to return one of her American children.  The immoral actions of this woman dumbfound me.

Never abandon anyone, children especially.  It will haunt them for the rest of their lives...   Sacrifice. 

As the single mother of an adopted child i understand this ladys feelings.The thought of finding a home for mine has crossed my mind alot.  It has been a couple of years since I adopted and I love the child but the bond is not there yet. She is special needs and the state lied to me about all the help that was available I was even told to tell this child her past abuse and the fact htere is no known father. The child is  4!!! Whats that about traumatize her further?One place told me if I went there for help any and everything that the child says even "mommy made me mad" could be reported to the state for investigation. We struggle now to make ends meet. I understand and applaud this lady for making a very tough decision. Let the child go where he will be bonded and have the kind of love he needs to grow and thrive.

AWFUL, AWFUL, AWFUL....what kind of message does this send to people who have adopted or are beginning the adoption process?   Children do not come with guarantees.  They are truly a blessing no matter what kind of issues they may develop. As a social worker and a mom who has adopted, I feel for the agency that placed this child initially. 

She done the right thing because there is so many moms that are killing there babies because they can not handle it so this is better than her later abusing this child she done the correct thing.

As a mother of 2 adopted children. I have 2 viewpoints:  #1  is I am glad she gave him to someone else as she was  not up to the task and the child would only suffer. #2  is she was not up to the task! Not having bonded after 5-6 months is nothing new. How puny! I have a daughter with Reactive Attachment Disorder who we adopted 10 years ago. Thank goodness we didn't give up on her! It often takes years and LOTS of the right kind of therapy to help a child heal. There ARE times when an adopted child is "put back" into the system or given to another family, but usually after all options have been exhausted and the entire family is at high risk of dissolving. But any of the parents I have interacted with who have had to do so, hung in there and gave it their all. Not just 5-6 months. I could say more, but I am sure others will. I hope and pray the baby is with a family that deserves him.

I don't understand how a mother could give a baby away for any reason, but I have not lived her life and therefor will not judge this woman. Everyone has to make decisions based on what they think is best. Looking from the outside we do not know what this woman has gone through in her decision making process. I do not agree with giving an adoptive baby away but I also will not say horrible things about this woman and judge her. I would not be any better of a person in doing so. People need to be able to make their own decisions in life and not have people persecute them, especially when the persecuter has never walked in their shoes.

Far better she gave the child up rather than try to raise him and the resentment that would follow. The child deserves better.

 I have a pet cat that my entire family is allergic to. We are literally suffering because of his existence in our home. I did not know that we were allergic to cats before I got him.  If I had known I never would have brought him home.  However, he has been living with us for four years now. I often think about how nice it would be to find another home for him and then we can clean up the air quality in our house so we can breathe better.  I love my cat but I don't have a bond with him.  I believe when you make a commitment to provide for another living being you honor that commitment.  In my case I really need to re-evaluate what's in the best interest of my human family members and myself, so I may have to break the commitment that I made to the cat. Perhaps Anita felt the same way about her adopted child.  Maybe he wasn't a good fit for her family, so she felt he would be better off with another family. My problem is that he was a  member of the family not an optional pet. I wonder how her other kids felt about there little brother being given away.  Did they have a bond with him? Do they miss him? Do they live in fear that they may be given away if their mom doesn't feel a close connection to them?

This woman is a disgrace! How dare she do this to that little boy...shameful!

Think through all of these comments when you look at abortion.  Do people feel the same intensity about throwing away a child as they do about what this mom did?  And Baby D is still alive to enjoy life like the rest of us!

I cannot pass judgement on this lady because I don't know what really happened\ bu\t why did she feel the need to adopt after 4 biological daughters? She probably has some deep-seated issues about her own life that she needs to deal with. Because she's married to a servicemember who's frequently deployed is no reason to try to drown her sorrows by having children. It seems like there is a void in her life that needs to be filled because of his absence. Adopting a child is not the way to fill that void. Since she bonded so well with her biological children, why didn't she just go for more babies or get a puppy? The adopted baby didn't bond with her because he probably sensed her apprehensions for him and basically went into self-preservation mode. Humans do have a six-sense about feelings; if someone doesn't like you on a subconscious level, you tend to know it on another level. It is a basic instinct. The lady needs some psychological counseling to help her cope with herself before she can deal with a child.

I am the adoptive and biological mother of three children. While I am completely bonded with my two youngest (one of whom is adopted), I will never have the relationship with the oldest child that I have with the others. The child was 6 when adopted, which may have made a difference. The child remembers her birth family and foster parents. I have accepted that I will not have the same relationship with her, and I wish that I did. As I tell her often, I wish I had given birth to her, because she is exactly what I want in an older daughter. However, I couldn't possibly give her away. She is my daughter after all. It took a long time and therapy to break through her shell to get to the relationship we have now. I love her so much, but because I didn't have to feed her, change her, bathe her, etc., we don't have that bond that I have with the younger two. I don't fault this mother, but perhaps she should have given it more time.

I think your natural children will naturally bond to their mother.  How horrible to put this child through this for 18 months.  You do not just 'give' away any child because you are not bonding.  Maybe you should check yourself!