Breast Cancer Knock Out

After my cancer diagnosis with the shock and fear that ensued. The next step was chemotherapy for 6 months. "Dr. will I lose my hair (which was mid-back)? It sounds vain and I searched my heart to understand why my hair was so important to me. I came to understand that for ME, it was easier to worry about losing my hair than to think of what was on the horizon with treatments and that I really could die! I was so frightend. I had associated my feminity in part to my breasts AND my hair. I have learned that this is not true.

I have always been very independent living in major metropolitan cities on my own with much travel alone. I was 43, single and my independence was something I took great pride it in. NOW, people were going to see me and know I was sick. People would pity me and stare. I would expose myself to the would as vulnerable and someone that needed help. Even with a wig, I knew that I would still have these feelings.

If I could overcome this fear of being so openly vulnerable and really learn that I am not "my hair" or "my breasts". I have my feminity regardless and this could never be taken from me!

I tried to think of something that might help others. Many of the images I found on the internet were not so encouraging. A photographer friend of mine wanted to help. I had to put myself in a certain place emotionally to project what I wanted to in order for the photos to demonstrate: strength, hope, fire, spirit, determination and fight.