Feelings, Possessiveness and Anti-Emotional Propaganda

There have been many men, some acquainted with me personally and some not so, who keep attacking feelings or people's rights to have feelings. All feelings, that is, except one: jealousy and possessiveness. If their wife or their girlfriend leaves them, then they go around getting sympathy for their feelings. Meanwhile they have spent the relationship with the woman attacking any feeling that she may have had and maliciously abusing her out of the consideration that feelings are an inferior function and should be suppressed.

All feelings, that is, except this: Their jealousy and possessiveness over the woman.

This hypocrisy has gone on long enough. If feelings are bad, then so are the feelings of jealousy and possessiveness. And if their feelings of jealousy and possessiveness are to be honored, then so are other feelings that people have. It's one or the other. Either feelings are bad and they have no right to their feelings of jealousy and possessiveness; or feelings are not bad and should not be subjected to abuse, attack or wrongful moralizing.

There is only one solution to this problem. The solution is recognizing that people have feelings; that there is a reason why people have feelings; and that these feelings are necessary. And coming from that are possible more wholesome relationships in which feelings do not draw abuse but rather synergize with the feelings of the partner, along with all else that is in the partner, to create viable outcomes. To spend the relationship attacking the woman's feelings, as many men do, and then indulging in their feelings of jealousy and possessiveness when the woman leaves them is a vastly destructive hypocrisy. People have feelings. People have right to have feelings. This is the case both with the women and with the men.

The anti-emotional propaganda must go. It is both destructive and hypocritical. The feelings of jealousy and possessiveness do not begin to hold greater validity than other feelings; instead they are among the worst feelings that there are. And the world will be a much better place if it is these feelings, and not the better feelings, that people see as an inferior function or are taught to control and to suppress.