This came to me while watching shows like 16 & Pregnant and reflecting on issues relating to single parent households, teenage pregnancies, the Bristol Palins of the world as well as the African American community which I am a part of.
A son could look up in awe at a billion stars but never find a love as abundant as his mother’s. A daughter could sneak into her mother’s jewelry box and play with diamond necklaces & earrings but never find a single one as everlasting as her Mother’s love. A baby could stand up and take its first steps and as the pitter-patter of tiny feet echoed through the hallway, no embrace could be as soothingand comforting, as well intentioned and responsible as that of a mother as she picks up her stumbling infant. You see, a mother is a mother and love is love; it doesn’t come with pre-requisites of marriage or coupledom; pre-requisites that incorrectly question the competence and parenting aptitude of a single parent.
I’m not going to sit here and argue circumstances; I’m not here to debate about the baby conceived from a one night stand nor am I here to argue about whether or not octomom is mentally stable. I’m not here to debate the deserting boyfriend nor am I going to dissect the circumstances surrounding a widowed or divorced mother. I’m here to simply say that regardless of circumstances, we are a society that’s too quick to pass judgment as we formulate conclusions based off of our misconceptions and misunderstanding. We’re the ‘Christians’ at church that huddle and gossip about someone else’s daughter being pregnant. We’re theconservative Ann Coulter’s who go on talk shows like ‘the View’ and say “single mothers are like a farm team for future criminals and social outcasts”. We are that society that chastises the single mother for not conforming to the ideal definition of the traditional family but yet we hypocritically give the single father a pat on the back for being a “strong and responsible being”. We are the pompous and arrogant twenty-something-year-olds that insist they would never date someone with a kid. We are a society that produces statistics and figures of single parent minorities as we present them as a burden on the American tax payer but when Sarah Palin’s daughter gets pregnant out of wedlock at the age of seventeen that same society says “we should respect the privacy of their family”.
I’d like to believe that if every child is a gift, then surely every mother, single or otherwise has indeed been blessed. An individual and society that insists otherwise in its behavior and attitude is unsettling, doped up on self-righteoushype and void of compassion. The competence and ability of a single mother to be a good parent should never be measured by individuals and a society that has a questionable moral compass but rather should be celebrated as a testament of Love overcoming the struggles of single parenthood.
Twitter | @kwapiv