Saving Us From Wal-Mart Hell

It's been a while since I posted a press release from Crazytown. I'm
not sure whether these guys quiet down in the winter or hibernate or
what, but the extreme basketcases of the religious right seem to be
fair weather christians in a literal sense -- they'll go out and fight
the Lord's fight as long as the weather's nice.

Today's Mayor of Crazytown is Rev. Flip Benham of Operation Save America.

Christian Newswire:

Operation
Save America will be storming the gates of hell at Wal-Mart
Headquarters this Friday, December 15, 2006, in Bentonville, Arkansas.
"The Church of Jesus Christ is coming out of the closet in an attempt
to save an old friend. Wal-Mart, the largest retailer in the world and
the favorite store of the American Christian family, has become an
enemy of God," states Rev. Flip Benham, Director of Operation Save
America.

[Rev.Flip said,] "Wal-Mart took a huge hit in November
as hundreds of Christian families took to the streets of their local
Wal-Mart stores, but not to purchase any items. They came to expose an
ugly truth about this once 'God fearing' corporation. Wal-Mart has been
blackmailed by the radical homosexual agenda and the abortion industry.
Rather than honoring God, Wal-Mart is now promoting homosexual sodomy
and the killing of His children.

Here's where things get really fun...

"Every
executive at Wal-Mart Corporate that has allowed this hostile take-over
needs a good old fashioned tongue lashing in Jesus' Name and a
spanking! What Wal-Mart has done is sin! It is a betrayal of our Lord
Jesus. It is a betrayal of Sam Walton (the founder of Wal-Mart) and his
powerful Christian legacy. It is a betrayal of Christian families
everywhere. Wal-Mart must bear the fruit of repentance."

Rev.
Flip doesn't really sublimate the gay very well, does he? All this talk
about spanking and lashing -- it's kind of creeping me out. Once these
guys get rolling, their psyches are right out there.

Operation Save America isn't so much an organization of people concerned about issues, as it is an organization of people with issues. And excessive intelligence isn't one of them. I've written about these guys before, during a summer abortion protest in Mississippi.

Clarion Ledger:

Anti-abortion
activists [from Operation Save America] over the last week have trotted
out an aborted fetus in a vacuum-packed bag, torn up then burned a
Quran, shredded a gay pride flag, and preached Jesus' message over
loudspeakers in the street.

They can't really
figure out what the hell they're supposed to be protesting here. Is it
still abortion? Because, here's the thing, Muslims are mostly pro-life
and gays... Well, they don't actually get abortions. Someone needs to explain to them where babies come from.

Back
to Rev. Flip. He get's his message as muddled as he can. "We are not a
protest. We are a proclamation that Jesus Christ is Lord!" he tells us.
"We are calling an 'old friend' back to its Godly roots. Wal-Mart can
be saved and so can America. It begins with God's Church!"

Here,
I thought it was about the 'homosexual agenda' and abortion. What the
hell Wal-Mart has to do with abortion is never really made clear, but
there ya go.

And Wal-Mart can't win for losing. They've got the
crazies mad at them for imagined baby killing and everyone else mad at
them for selling a video game based on the Rapture Right themed 'Left
Behind' novels where christians kill the unsaved.

It says a lot about Operation Save America that not even virtual crusades are enough to win them over.