The World’s Most Prestigious Power Poll: Week 13

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01. New York Giants [10-1]: Good quarterback, great rushing attack, and a top-notch defense. This Giants team is a worthy successor to its great predecessors. 

02. Tennessee Titans [10-1]: Got pwned by the Jets, but next three opponents [Detroit, Cleveland, Houston] should ensure the Titans home field advantage throughout the playoffs. 

03. New York Jets [8-3]: This team can no longer be taken lightly. They didn’t just beat the Titans in their own building. They destroyed the Titans in their own building. 

04. Pittsburgh Steelers [8-3]: A good team that won’t be good enough to get through the playoffs unless Willie Parker gets healthy and returns to form in December. 

05. Tampa Bay Buccaneers [8-3]: Do you know what Jeff Garcia does besides impregnate Playboy Playmates? He wins games. Lots and lots of games. 

06. Carolina Panthers [8-3]: This is a good team that has a disturbing habit of getting blown out by their division rivals. 

07. Baltimore Ravens [7-4]: We always knew this team would be dangerous if they ever found an offense.

08. New England Patriots [7-4]: Tom Brady learning that hanging out with supermodels causes even more groin injuries than playing football. Heck, I could have told him that. 

09. Indianapolis Colts [7-4]: Winners of 4 straight and with Cleveland, Cincinnati, Detroit, and Jacksonville next up on the schedule, another 11 or 12 win season for Peyton & Co. is in the cards. No team will go into the AFC playoffs with more momentum than the Colts.

10. Atlanta Falcons [7-4]: With QB Matt Ryan the favorite by miles for Rookie of the Year and TB Michael Turner just entering his prime, the Falcons could be poised for a Super Bowl run for the next 4 or 5 years. 

11. Dallas Cowboys [7-4]: Looking at 8-4 after they dispatch the cupcake Seahawks on Thanksgiving Day, but then the Steelers, Giants and Ravens threaten to end Dallas’ season early. 

12. Washington Redskins [7-4]: The next two games [Giants, Ravens] will be brutal, but the Skins can get healthy in the last 3 weeks against Cincinnati, Philly, and the 49ers. 

13. Arizona Cardinals [7-4]: You’d think a team desperate to establish some credibility wouldn’t want to play in a stadium named for the University of Phoenix online.

14. Chicago Bears [6-5]: Okay, so they beat the Rams. Big deal! Only a really awful team would lose to the St. Lou — wait. Never mind.

15. New Orleans Saints [6-5]: The offense is fantastic, but I think the defense could use even more steroids.

16. Miami Dolphins [6-5]: Chad Pennington proves that a decent quarterback makes all the difference.

17. Philadelphia Eagles [5-5-1]: When we learned that Donovan McNabb has never heard of The World’s Most Prestigious Power Poll, all the world wondered: What else doesn’t this guy know about? Now we have our answer.

18. Buffalo Bills [6-5]: Hasn’t been the same since they gave Dick Jauron a contract extension.

19. Denver Broncos [6-5]: All season I’ve been arguing that the Broncos are terrible. I think losing by 3 touchdowns to the Raiders ends the argument.

20. Green Bay Packers [5-6]: Even Paris Hilton doesn’t get scored on that often on a Monday night.

21. Minnesota Vikings [6-5]: Imagine what this team could do with a real QB instead of Gus Frerotte.

22. San Diego Chargers [4-7]: It is written in the Book of Revelations: “No coach named Norv will ever win a Super Bowl.”

23. Jacksonville Jaguars [4-7]: It used to be this dump of a town could boast: “Well, at least we’ve got a good NFL team.” Now, they’ve got nothing.

24. Cleveland Browns [4-7]: If you don’t believe in the supernatural, explain how this crappy Browns team beat the Giants by 3 touchdowns.

25. Houston Texans [4-7]: Another fine season from Andre Johnson wasted.

26. San Francisco 49ers [3-8]: I began to suspect Mike Martz draws his game plans up in the dark when I noticed that the team’s best player, Frank Gore, got only 14 carries last Sunday.

27. Seattle Seahawks [2-9]: This team is tanking faster than Yahoo’s share price.

28. Oakland Raiders [3-8]: It’s been a terrible season for Al Davis…until his Raiders stomped Mike Shanahan’s Broncos. That makes up for the rest of the season.

29. Cincinnati Bengals [1-9-1]: What will it take to convince owner Mike Brown to fire himself and hire a real general manager?

30. St. Louis Rams [2-10]: Trent Green’s 41.7 passer rating proves that no matter what your frat brothers tell you, replacing the protective coating around your brain with Jello pudding is just a terrible idea.

31. Kansas City Chiefs [1-10]: In a league full of Harley’s, these guys brought a moped.

32. Detroit Lions [0-11]: Team motto for the last 7 years: There’s nothing wrong with this team that another high draft choice won’t fix!

MVP offense: QB Drew Brees

MVP defense: LB Joey Porter

Rookie of the Year: QB Matt Ryan

Coach of the Year: Tony Sparano