Ark of the Covenant Won't be Revealed; World Not Surprised

Okay, so apparently Abuna Paulos of Ethiopia was misquoted when Italian media reported he would unveil the Ark of the Covenant to the world.

"I am deeply disappointed that the Italian media misquoted me and disseminated false information about me unveiling the Ark of the Covenant to the world," he said at a news conference.

And while conspiracy theorists and the severely devout were probably turning blue while they waited for the unveiling, the rest of us aren't the least bit surprised at this final turn of events.

Anyway, most people gather news from mainstream news sources, and as such, most probably hadn't heard the fabricated announcement. The only agencies touching this story were fringe news services and the odd international outlet, so only those with peculiar interests – or those geeks who actually work in the media – would know anything about it.

Basically, the mainstream press were aware that the last coat if wax needed to be laid on the relic, and only after the final layer of paint had dried.

We're not saying that the Ark isn't real. Nor are we saying that we doubt Ethiopia is housing the relic. All we're saying is...well, nothing really. But if we have to say something, this will have to do: Don't believe everything you read.

Go team!