Barnacles: The big studs of the sea

by Barry ORegan | February 8, 2008 at 08:06 am

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Opinion
Barry Artiste, Now Public Contributor
So many questions,
I just want to know who pays these Scientists? Anyway why do we care? Sex Researchers and Drug manufacturers of male enhancement drugs thats who!! Will there be a X rated Movie on Barnacles on the National Geographic Channel? Who would actually watch it? Is their Barnacle Envy among the Sea Creatures of the Deep? Will Seafarers Magazine have a centerfold spread featuring the Biggest Barnacle? Will it be a one-handed publication? Will we soon be inuldated by Spammers who will flood the market to sell enhancement drugs made from Barnacles? If it works, will Spammers start selling Barnacle Viagra, because males the world over will not know how to handle their new appendage which is reportedly can grow 8 times your height. Will runway models make a mad dash to get this new Barnacle Enhancement drug if it is ever developed? Will Underwear manufacturers have price their underwear to consumers by the square meter? "You can bet your Bulge they will !" ......... and then what about the man who prefers to go "Commando".... What of them?

Barnacles: The big studs of the seaJamie Hall,
Canwest News ServicePublished: Friday, February 08, 2008
EDMONTON - In a barnacle's world, it's not just size that matters, it's shape, too.

And it turns out they have both.

Two University of Alberta marine biologists have discovered that barnacles are the best-endowed of all species -with penises that can reach up to eight times their body length.The invertebrate animals, which spend their entire lives attached to rocks, are able to change not only the size but the shape of their penises to better reach potential mates.

This sexual feat is directly related to the force of wave motion within their habitat.

Chris Neufeld and Richard Palmer, whose findings were published Thursday in the Proceedings of the Royal Society B, a biological research journal, already knew from past projects that intertidal barnacles could rapidly change the length of their feeding legs to catch food in the water to deal with the wide range of water velocities they experienced.

The question then became: Does it apply to other appendages?

The answer was yes.

The pair conducted their research at the Bamfield Marine Sciences Centre on the west coast of Vancouver Island, where they sampled barnacles collected from Barclay Sound in a wide range of variations in wave force.

When wave action was light, the barnacles' penises became longer and thinner, in higher wave action they became shorter and stouter, in both cases to make them more manoeuvrable in the flow of water and thus able to reach more mates.

Barnacles are hermaphrodites, so they can mate with males or females, Neufeld explained.