CDC Denies Zombie Apocalypse; is the LPQ-79 Virus Real?

The Center for Disease Control denied any impending zombie apocalypse in an email to the Huffington Post, saying they do not know of a virus or condition that would 'reanimate the dead'. 

If you're looking for some comfort in the days of cannibalistic incidents and mysterious substances effecting people, the CDC says there is nothing to worry about; Zombies don't exist. 

In an email to the Huffington Post, a news organization who evidently asked the Center for Disease Control this question, the CDC spokesperson David Daigle had the folowing official statement to offer: 

“CDC does not know of a virus or condition that would reanimate the dead (or one that would present zombie-like symptoms)..."

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Well, we know better, right? A series of events that started around May 16th with a mysterious, still unidentified rash among high school students and teachers in Florida. Since then, other mysterious chemicals and acts of cannibalism and zombie-like behavior have occured within the last two weeks.

• Zombie Apocalypse Coming Soon: Compelling Evidence for an Attack

What kind of bees like to eat people? ZOM BEES. To be completely accurate, there is a parasitic fly that invades the brains of bees and causes them to act like zombies. There is also a parasitic Ophiocordyceps fungus that causes ant zombification. The zombification begins when the fungus shoots spores onto an insect. The parasitic fungus gradually takes over the ant's brain and directs the insect to a cool, moist location. The fungus then kills the ant, and fruiting bodies erupt from the ant's head and spread more spores. Be glad you're not an ant.

What about the LQP-79 Zombie Virus?
There was a claim that a virus known as LQP-79 could produce zombie-like cannibalistic behavior in humans. The incident in which Rudy Eugene went zombie-like and ate over three-quarters of a homeless man's face sparked a fake Huffington Post article that claimed Eugene was not actually high on bath salts, but instead infected with the deadly LQP-79 virus. Although the it may seem to be a reasonable explanation as to why someone would want to eat another man's face, the purpose of the LQP-79 virus is simply for humor.