Fireworks Recalled on Third of July — Why?

It never ceases to amaze me how efficient and effective government bureaucracies can be. Case in point is a recall notice — dated July 3 — that I found posted on the U.S. Government-run Recalls.gov.   The notice, which made me want to laugh and cry at the same time, was worded this way: Black Cat Fireworks Recalls Fireworks Due to Injury Hazard.

According to the notice, the recall was issued because the Black Cat Screech and Scream firework can “produce a loud bang and unexpectedly scatter debris, posing an injury hazard to the user and bystanders.”

Come again?

Isn’t a firework supposed to produce a loud bang? And is anything a firework produces truly unexpected? Apparently not, despite the fact that the label cautions users about “showers of sparks.”

Now, in order to keep up with the geniuses at the Consumer Product Safety Commission, the folks at Black Cat Fireworks are going to have to rethink how their products — which, by the way, have been part of Fourth of July festivities in the the United States since the 1940s — can continue to entertain without making noises or emitting sparks after exploding.

Final thought: The fact that the CPSC issued the recall only one day before the nation celebrated its 232nd birthday tells me that no one within that agency was genuinely serious about the recall in the first place. Instead, they were merely participating in a paperwork exercise under the guise of maintaining public safety.

Still, I feel much safer now. Don’t you?

-- Bob McCarty Writes