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Jonathon Sharkey: Florida Vampire to Run For President

by Jordan Yerman | March 16, 2010 at 10:53 am

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Jonathon 'The Impaler' Sharkey: GOP Vampire Goes to Washington

Jonathon "The Impaler" Sharkey, a self-styled vampire is heading to Washington, D.C. to begin a campaign to contest the Presidency in 2012. The 45-year-old Florida resident has run for office in the past: in 2006, Jonathon Sharkey ran for Governeor of Minnesota, as well as presidential bids in 2004 and 2008.

Apparently, the media storms surrounding Sarah Palin, Barack Obama, John McCain, and Hilary Clinton drowned out the vampire, who has switched his party affiliation from Independent to Republican.

Jonathon Sharkey is also a pro wrestler who goes under the name Rocky "Hurricane" Flash, and is trying to make a documentary about his bid for the White House.

Vampire vs Family Values

The Impaler may have an uphill battle in wooing Republican support, even if one doesn't count the vampirism. Johnathon Sharkey, who claims not to have dated a girl older than 19 in the past four years, is engaged to a 19-year-old from Ohio who also identifies as a vampire, and has admitted to harassing 16-year-old girl via email after she contacted him via MySpace.

Jnathon Sharkey also has a restraining order from the family of Paige Marie Brewer, whom he is accused of "brainwashing". Sharkey and Brewer were engaged up until February 2010.

Sharkey also spent time in jail after intimidating a judge.

The criminal complaint says he was running for president in 2007 when the 16-year-old Rochester girl wrote a message of support on his MySpace page. She told police they began dating online, and the threats began when she tried to break off the relationship.

"He does believe in Republican values," Matthews said. "Is he going to make a big splash with his current identification of being a vampire? That's up to the voters to decide."