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Attorney General Holder orders America to turn itself in
Washington, DC -- The Obama Administration’s top lawman has officially arrested the entire population of the United States. In an unprecedented Justice Department directive, Attorney General Eric Holder... NYC Premiere: Fear of a Black Republican - May 15
FEAR OF A BLACK REPUBLICAN holds NEW YORK CITY premiere ON MAy 15TH Documentary Looks At Lack of Black Republicans in Two-Party SystemTrenton, NJ -Shamrock Stine Productions, LLC has announced that its first ... Dick Cheney busted at Bush library dedication (Parody)
Dallas, Texas -- Former Vice President Dick Cheney missed most of the ceremonies dedicating the George W. Bush Library here. Federal Library Enforcement Agency (FLEA) officers pulled him out of the crowd to... Republican Guilt-trips
A lot of Republicans like to use guilt trips to glorify the actions of their constituents, and in most cases these guilt-trips are misplaced. At the same time they like to discount accomplishments made by the Democrats and either deny their existence or give credit for these... Gun debate leads to a rise in suicides (satire)
Washington, DC -- As the gun control debate enters its fifth month with no end in sight, mental health authorities are blaming the drawn out policy dispute for a rise in the nation’s suicide rate. The major... Fundamentalists won't let men/women pray together
"The moment we allow these groups a foothold, then tomorrow they will start to restrain us in our own synagogues, in the name of democracy, in the name of liberalism and in the name of pluralism," says one Shmuel Poppenheim, an Israeli ultra-Orthodox activist. What he was... Korean tyrant buys world domination plan from US defense firm
Pyongyang, North Korea -- Spring is the season when a young man’s fancy turns toward world domination. And so it goes with North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un, who recently purchased a blueprint to take over the... Cyprus Banks Take Back Toasters, Ruin Breakfast
Nicosia, Cyprus - The shiny toasters that bank customers received for opening new accounts are being confiscated by the financial institutions that gifted them. Objective: to help ease this country’s multibillion... Candidates reminded not to put-up campaign ads on trees
MANILA - With the start of the campaign period for local elective posts, Clean Up the Philippines Movement, Inc. on Easter Sunday reminded all local candidates not to put-up or place campaign ads on trees. Atty. Sharon Millan-Decano, Secretary General of Clean Up the... Sabrina lost her grandmother
Sometimes - being a beautiful child makes a baby an easy target. At least that is what the late Louise Hey thought when she learned that she would never see her only grandchild again. Louise Hey recently passed away. We are left with the... GOP Acquires Carnival Cruise Lines for ‘Fun and Profit’
Somewhere At Sea - Looking to shake its stodgy image and sinking popularity, the Republican Party has purchased Carnival Cruise Lines. The move is designed to rebrand and re-energize the right side of the political... Tribal Group Sues the Vatican Over Smoke Signal Rights
Cheyenne, Wyoming -- The Tribal Gathering Is taking the Catholic Church to court over its use of smoke signals to announce papal election results. “Just because you know how to build a fire doesn’t mean you can... Bloomberg Bids To Become The Second Jewish Pope
The Vatican -- New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg is moving to complete a deal that would make him the second Jewish Pontiff of the Roman Catholic Church. “St. Peter was Jewish and he turned out to be the... Gun control and does my saying I am an atheist insult you?
Issues in the News: I. Global warming is the worst that has been seen since 11,000 years ago. That's a darn long time. It took 4000 years for the earth to warm 1.25 degrees C (which is over 2 degrees F) from 11,000 years ago to 7000 years ago. Tiny marine organisms were used... SEQUESTER HOUR +5 UPDATE: Yes Mom, We’re Still Alive
http://newsdoors.blogspot.com/2013/03/sequester-hour-5-update-yes-mom-were.html A quick report from Florida after the disaster which was purported to end all life on earth at midnight last night if one believes the White House and mainstream media: 1. All warm blooded... Top Members Today
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