Google Project Glass: The Future of Augmented Reality (& Porn)

Google's Project Glass: In the Future, Glasses Will Out-Douche Bluetooth Earpieces

Google released a video for Project Glass, the next step in its augmented-reality work that already includes the marginally-functional Google Goggles. I hope you're ready for actual Google goggles, or, rather Google glasses.

Just imagine: a future where people will walk around wearing something even douchier than those Bluetooth earpieces. A future where even more people will bump into parking meters and lightposts while multitasking their way down the sidewalk.

Google envisions a future in which everyone walks around muttering to their eyewear like they were Tony Stark in the Iron Man suit, hoping that content providers get their shit together enough to supply useful information to splash against Google Glass users' retinas.

Google is testing its Project Glass glasses now. In public.

I know I reference the criminally-underrated Tim Robbins/Samantha Morton sci-fi film Code 46 a lot, but here we go again. This is very Code 46.

I, for one, look forward to a world of constant sidewalk slapstick and commuters shaking their glasses when the subway info won't load. I don't doubt that a juggernaut like Google can make the Project Glass technology work; they most likely can (and Google isn't the only company trying to make augmented-reality glasses happen).

The technology is also undoubtedly cool: you, too, can feel like you're piloting a jillion-dollar fighter jet when you run your daily errands, and you could scope out the bus stop from down the street and know in advance if you should be strolling or running. (Also, I've always wanted a pair of Mission: Impossible glasses that could take photos.)

However, the Google Glasses (is that what they'll be called?) will be a platform, and platforms require an ecosystem of information, which will be provided with a rather wide spectrum of competence, and from groups with varying agendas and business models. IN fact, the real-life user experience with Google Glasses would most likely be like this.

Also, take a moment to envision the future of spam.

And the future of porn.

Porn on Your Augmented-Reality Glasses

I'm just going to say this right now: the dev teams for every online porn outfit on the web are watching the Google Project Glass video below and thinking, "we can create an app that matches sex footage from our libraries to the body positions of passersby spotted by augmented-reality glasses". I promise you, that's what they're thinking.

Time for another sci-fi film reference: Minority Report.

Meanwhile, check out the video below. I dig the first wearer's older MacBook Pro. I'm also sure that the MTA will never have a reliable AI subway schedule within the next decade.

Videos

Project Glass: One day___

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