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Bird-excrement facial takes off in New York

by Barry Artiste | April 26, 2008 at 04:49 am

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Opinion
Barry Artiste, Now Public Contributor

As one client coos "It's so Rich and Creamy", Hello !!!!
"It's Friggin Bird Shit !!!!"

No matter how you package it, or tout it's ancient Culture, it's still "Bird Shit!!"

It's frustrating enough to find it "splattered" all over my windshield. I am sure once it hit's Trendy Kitsalano, I'll be at a stoplight and mobs of women, "Starbuck Lattes" in hand will be whipping off the tops of their Lattes, trying to scrap the Bird Crap off my windshield for a Quickie Lunchtime Facial, much cheaper than paying $180.00 Bucks for one. Hell, you can be sure Squeegie Kids will be mining this "Grey Gold" at every stoplight too.

Bandwagons, the mainstay of Trendsetter's everywhere, with money and no taste, must spend their days scanning Fashion Magazines looking for Trendy Bandwagons in which to jump on.

One can be certain LaLa Land celebs will certainly jump on this trend, with their toy "Purse Pooches" receiving the same treatment.

Bird-excrement facial takes off in New YorkReutersPublished: Saturday, April 26, 2008
NEW YORK -- Forget avocado, evening primrose oil or other exotic ingredients, the latest facial to hit New York is a mask made with bird excrement.

The Geisha Facial, available at Shizuka New York for $180 US, about $100 more than the shop's other facials, contains nightingale excrement.

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Jordan Yerman

at 05:43 on April 26th, 2008

Using animal waste as a skin product is fairly common; several skin creams contain urea. (I wonder if any of them contain distillate of human urine- that would be kind of a cool job: "I'm the pee guy for that hand cream!")

Barry Artiste

at 06:36 on April 26th, 2008

Yeah well, some Urine has sterile properties, but excrement certainly has none. Bet your bottom dollars, counterfiet facila cream will hit the market if not already, wonder whats in that?

Thank God I'm a Guy, and not a slave to fashion trends

eastvanray

at 12:15 on April 26th, 2008

Fake bird crap cream? That would really piss me off if I paid good money to put bird crap on my face only to find out that I got no real brid crap. Man, some people have no ethics! If it's from China you might get some lead though.

Barry Artiste

at 13:17 on April 26th, 2008

Hell, Lead, Mercury, Uranium, and god know what? Though I do not know how yuou could counterfiet Crap, I mean come on, who would want to, anything they use to counterfeit it has to be better than shit?