The dowry system is so deeply rooted in Indian culture, that sometimes one feels that there's going to be no way out - at least not for another century. Even modern, well-educated families start saving up money for their daughter's dowry as soon as she is born, so what can one expect from the uneducated masses, whose only form of education is tradition? When demands for dowry are not met, the bride is subject to torture, and often even killed. The reason many parents don't want to have daughters is because of the dowry they will have to shell out at her marriage, and the stress they go through due to never ending demands from her in-laws. Dowry is an evil, evil system and all of us, at some level, condone it and even contribute to it. Often the boys parents don't demand dowry, but our culture is such that we feel we must give something to the in-laws. In such cases, give as much as you receive. When you go out of your way because you are the parents of the girl, you are contributing to this evil. Come festivals like Diwali or Holi, and the parents of the daughter flood her in-laws with gifts. If gifts are expected - your daughter is married into the wrong family. If such giving is self-inflicted, you're making a mistake. Give a token present to your daughter. If you want to give her something more, do so, but don't feel pressured to give anything more than you receive to her in-laws. You don't need to if your daughter is happily married and has a supportive husband - so DON'T.