Fat Bastard: "Small Stool" Gets Reduced Prison Sentence !

Opinion
Barry Artiste, Now Public Contributor

There is nothing "Dead Sexy" about this "Fat Bastard Drug Gangster Big Mike", as he is called, as he sings that familiar "Whale Song of  Discrimination " because Prison life is full of hardships for this portly Behemoth.

Big Mike you see, tips the "Scales of Justice" at a  Dainty 430 pounds and is growing.  Big Mike charges amongst other things that he  cannot find "Stools" able to accommodate  with  waif like poundage.

In additon Big Mike claims he has gained 50 pounds in the 2 years he has been in prison. One wonders if he made use of Canadian Prisons generous Gyms which are more opulent than most health clubs?

Apparently Fat Bastard has bent the ear of a Sympathetic Judge who ordered the prison to accomodate "Mike's Stools" to be more fitting to  his self imposed lifestyle as well , this judge  has reduced  Mikes  5 year sentence by  6 months in the hopes  Mike will  see  how  accommodating the Canadian Justice System is towards people of  "Generous Proportions".

Mikes, Mom said the judges decision will bear fruit, a Fruit I guarantee you, like Jenny Craig, "Fat Bastard Mike" has never tasted or heard of!
 

Quebec jail can't accommodate obese convict
Updated Thu. May. 22 2008 7:02 PM ET
 The Canadian PressMONTREAL --

 A former chef who goes by the nickname "Big Mike'' has had his sentence for drug trafficking reduced because the provincial jail where he's incarcerated can't deal with his 430-pound weight.

Michel Lapointe has already served 20 months behind bars awaiting sentencing in what his lawyer described in court as hellish conditions."For the first eight months he didn't have a bed adjusted to his size,'' defence lawyer Clemente Monterosso said in an interview Thursday.

"He never got a chair adjusted to his size. The chair and the tables were too tight and he could not sit down.

In jail, the chairs are bolted to the ground and you cannot adjust them.''Monterosso said jail officials refused to provide a chair with a back to accommodate Lapointe's tattooed bulk -- jail chairs are more like stools -- saying they feared it could be broken and used as a weapon.

The poor prison diet has added more than 50 lbs to the Lapointe's pre-arrest weight of 375 pounds.

Where the shaven-headed convict consumed six pills of medication upon arrival in jail, he now must take 23.

It was also hard for Lapointe to take a shower."He's only 37 years old but now his health situation has deteriorated to the point that now he has to walk with a cane,'' Monterosso said. "He's been asking for a better diet but of course they refused that to him, telling him he's in jail, he's not in a hotel and there's only one menu.

''Lapointe was arrested during police raids on Sept. 20, 2006, that netted 24 others. He pleaded guilty in February to charges of conspiracy, drug trafficking and gangsterism.

He was sentenced to five years in jail Wednesday but under the formula used to calculate actual time behind bars, Lapointe will be out in about 14 months.

Quebec court Judge Marc Bisson also showed clemency in his case because of Lapointe's weight problems.

He also ordered the prison to get Lapointe a proper bed and chair.Claire Lapointe, Big Mike's mother, says her son has always had weight problems but they were exacerbated by his time behind bars and his health suffered."I think it's a terrible situation,'' she said in an interview. "Happily, the judge's decision yesterday was good, thanks for that, and I hope it will bear fruit.

Clemency has been granted in the past because of overcrowding in Toronto-area jails and the lack of a vegan diet for a British Columbia.

 http://www.ctv.ca/servlet/ArticleNews/story/CTVNews/20080522/obese_prisoner_080522/20080522?hub=Canada