God hath spoken to Pastor Jones

by YankeeJim | September 11, 2010 at 05:08 am
208 views | 4 Recommendations | 12 comments

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Will wonders never cease and may all my prayers be answered, Pastor Jones discovers the meaning of his Bible and the meaning of hate crimes.

“Breaking News Alert: Fla. pastor says his church will never burn Quran September 11, 2010 8:4:20 AM
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In an interview with MSNBC on Saturday, Florida Pastor Terry Jones said that his church will never burn a Koran, even if a mosque is built near ground zero.


http://link.email.washingtonpost.com/...Y7Q4/XL/h

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2
nanute

Well Jim. You know what they say about when something sounds too good to be true? What I find most disturbing about this entire story, is the media giving this wack job so much attention.

1
YankeeJim

You are absolutely right. News media has become an entertainment medium and it sometimes has dire consequences.

1
YankeeJim

I was reminded that God could be a she.

1
nanute

I wonder if she'd be any good on a Pogo Stick?

2
nanute

Here's John Prine's idea of who He was: 

John Prine Jesus the Missing Years Lyrics:
(spoken)
Jesus.... the missing years

It was raining. It was cold
West Bethlehem was no place for a twelve year old
So he packed his bags and he headed out
To find out what the world's about
He went to France. He went to Spain
He found love. He found pain.
He found stores so he started to shop
But he had no money so he got in trouble with a cop
Kids in trouble with the cops
From Israel didn't have no home
So he cut his hair and moved to Rome
It was there he met his Irish bride
And they rented a flat on the lower east side of Rome...
Italy that is
Music publishers, book binders, Bible
belters, Money Changers,
Spoon Benders and lots of pretty Italian chicks.

Chorus:
Charley bought some popcorn
Billy bought a car
Someone almost bought the farm
But they didn't go that far
Things shut down at midnight
At least around here they do
Cause we all reside down the block
Inside at ....23 Skidoo.

Wine was flowing so were beers
So Jesus found his missing years
So He went to a dance and said
"This don't move me"
He hiked up his pants and he went to a movie
On his thirteenth birthday he saw
[ Find more Lyrics on http://mp3lyrics.org/1G6X ]
"Rebel without a Cause"
He went straight on home and invented Santa Claus
Who gave him a gift and he responded in kind
He gave the gift of love and went out of his mind
You see him and the wife wasn't getting along
So he took out his guitar and he wrote a song
Called "The Dove of Love Fell Off the Perch"
But he couldn't get divorced in the Catholic Church
At least not back then anyhow
Jesus was a good guy he didn't need this shit
So he took a pill with a bag of peanuts and
A Coca-Cola and he swallowed it.
He discovered the Beatles
And he recorded with the Stones
Once He even opened up a three-way package
In Southern California for old George Jones

Repeat Chorus:

The years went by like sweet little days
With babies crying pork chops and beaujolais
When he woke up he was seventeen
The world was angry. The world was mean.
Why the man down the street and the kid on the stoop
All agreed that life stank. All the
world smelled like poop
Baby poop that is ..the worst kind
So he grew his hair long and thew away his comb
And headed back to Jerusalem to find Mom, Dad and home
But when he got there the cupboard was bare
Except for an old black man with a fishing rod
He said "Whatcha gonna be when you grow up?"
Jesus said "God"
Oh my God, what have I gotten myself into?
I'm a human corkscrew and all my wine is blood
They're gonna kill me Mama. They don't like me Bud.
So Jesus went to Heaven and he went there awful quick
All them people killed him and he wasn't even sick
So come and gather around me my contemporary peers
And I'll tell you all the story of
Jesus...The Missing Years


1
Piobar

the fact that men have such a sensitive, (should be) internal organ on the outside of our bodies does hint that God could be a woman.... and have a really twisted sense of humour. But then, there is equally valid proof that God is male... Maybe Pastor Jones could give Him/Her a call for us and find out?

1
t k kidwai

We have knowledge that big money plays its role not only in political but religious affairs as well.Power and money both are god.Which god spoke to the pastor, only God knows.Complete turn-around shouldn't surprise us.

1
anymoose

the same god who speaks to the big money behind radical islam. it's a shame we don't see a corresponding 'turn around' from those quarters of islamofascism.

1
t k kidwai

Offer better deal in terms of cash and other favours and see equally corresponding turn around not to feel ashamed.Christianofascism or Islamofascism ,German Nazism or Isreali Nazism all are one and same.What is there in a name,if aim and object is same.

1
anymoose

can't out bid o.p.e.c. not yet anyway. 

1
t k kidwai

At least you have admitted tacitly,if not candidly,that OPEC outbid zealout pseudo-Christians and Terry Jones changed his plans.In other words,you wanted Terry Jones to stick to his original plan,but you failed to outbid OPEC.Your failed efforts and dashed hopes to keep the embers of hate and bigotry glowing remind me of a saying:beggars ride horses in dreams.

2
anarkissed

Well this is a big step forward for east/west relations anyway.  Public pressure from Americans is what has changed this moron's intent, however much he may claim otherwise, and I don't doubt that the folks targeted by his intentions will appreciate it.  They can now see that Americans do not all support this behaviour.  Even if Westboro Baptist does hitch on and burn the Quaran I am sure that the Muslims will realize we can't sway that whack job for anything.

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