I Am Copyrighting Common Sense! Cause No One's Using It!

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Barry Artiste Op/Ed

As of today, October 10th, 2009, I,  Barry Artiste, claim “Common Sense” as my Copyright!

“Common Sense” is now proprietory and exclusive to ME! - "Barry Artiste!"

Anyone caught using "Common Sense" without my permission will be punished to the full extent of the law! I took this bold initiative because it seems “Common Sense” has not been practiced by anyone in Law Circles, Government or Olymp*ic organizations.

I will only allow “Common Sense” to be used by "Regular Joes and Janes" for a modest fee with the understanding that they only use it for good and not evil.

Transferring "Common Sense" without my consent, or payment to me by any unauthourized persons such as politicians, lawyers or a nameless sporting organization featured in this Op/Ed, will result in my revoking "Regular Joe or Jane's" use of “Common Sense” privileges forever!

Industry Canada’s Canadian Intellectual Property Office describes Copyrighted Material as:

Okay, now look at Number 4 above! What does it say? There you have it!

Now it seems that "Common Sense" has been dead and not used in the last 50 years, thanks to "Pot Smoking Hippies" and "Lefty Politicians" and their granola flock of sheep.  I can rightfully claim “Common Sense” as mine in its entirety as I have been rightfully applying it all my life, including in my Op/Ed stories on Now Public.

Now you may ask yourself why now Barry Artiste, “ Wordsmith and Wise Op/Ed Guru” of the Right Wing "Cool Blue" Conservative Party?

Well, the two stories I will be commenting on will surely prove my theory that "Common Sense" is non existent in the Province of British Columbia and pretty much any other province or state or country where "Lefty Liberalism" rears it moronic brainless cavity which many mistakenly call a head!

Story One

A Government Bill will allow police to enter homes during the 2010 Olymp*c Games to remove illegal signs!

With the 2010 Olymp*cs coming to a start in a few months, our illustrious "Liberal Government" under the direction of the Olymp*c Committee, have issued an ultimatum to all who feel they would like to get into the 2010 Olymp*c Spirit. The ultimatum is as follows:

The Olymp*c Committee, in agreement with the "Liberal British Columbia Government", have deemed that any logo, word or other symbol resembling a certain international sporting organization, (without their expressed permission) will result in major fines and or imprisonment for any citizen displaying Olymp*c-looking paraphenalia from their windows or outside their dwelling, such as a flag, or piece of kraft paper adornment (from your kids 1st grade artwork) displayed on your fridge.

Heaven help the graffiti artist who spray paints this certain five-ringed logo on a concrete overpass, or even doodles five rings on their school notebook cover which may resemble a certain sporting organizations logo.

Failure to comply, will result in a massive invasion of parachuting "Gestapoite -  Stormgruppenfurhertroopers", machine guns ablazing into your home, classroom, or street corner whilst you sip your Tim Horton latte coffee while holding a five ring doodle you absentmindedly drew on your 10th grade school notebook cover; cause you just know it will catch the moist garroulous eye of the policeman munching on a donut next to you.

Be warned people! 

For our American tourists who hail from the State of Washington, driver beware if you display the name of your state capitaln (Olympia) on your licence plate!

You may think Siberian labour camps were bad, but you ain't seen nothing.

Feel free though, to bring as much cocaine, heroin or guns across the border into Canada as long as you are not displaying a certain Olymp*c logo, cause police are on a respite from real criminals during the next few months, while this Olymp*c event plays out.  The police resources are now directed to concentrate all their efforts on copyright infringement. Real criminals be damned as they are too wily to catch and have better lawyers!

Now Vangroovians all know that the "Lefty Tofu-Lickin Province", and especially our City, love acronyms for their extree special police squads, cause we all know that government named acronyms scare the beejeezus out of criminals trying to pronounce these moronic acronyms.

Dazzle them with Brillance, and Baffle them with Bullshit! 

It would be nice if they actually caught and prosecuted criminals, but our Lefty Justices are way too busy sitting down to pee!

So, the Police squad acronyms we have range from IHIT, IHOP, IHIGH DEA, NDA. SFA, so many that it is hard to name them all.

Will we have one more police inspired acronym on the Left Coast Horizion?  Care to guess?  Too Late, Here it is, Voila!

The new police crime task force will be called IDIOT! This acronym will strike fear into those with Derring Do!

The new Police Squad acronym "IDIOT" will stand for "Integrated Department Investigating Olymp*c Transgressors"!

So be warned Vangroovians! 

Course any Olymp*c clothing or logo copies coming from China that hit local flea markets will be forgiven, after all, the lefty liberal government always state "We are the Pacific Asian Gateway" and really, really would rather not piss off China in all this.

After all, we do not want to be seen as racist in this "Feel good climate of Multiculturalism and Diversity Banjo Git off Mah Porch Donkey Show!"

Story Two

Olympic Cowichan sweater won't be knit by First Nation

It seems the Hudson Bay Company founded like over 500 years ago as one of Canada’s Fur Traders with the Indians, and once Canada’s proud Iconic symbol and institution in its own right as HBC has decided to Poo Poo Copyright of Artwork designed by others.

Artwork and Petroglyphs, hundreds if not thousands of years old, are the sole property of not an individual, but an entire First Nations!

Anyway more to the point.

It seems The Hudson’s Bay Company is the main supplier of 2010 Olymp*c wear, for not only the athletes but the public who wish to pay outrageous inflated prices for clothes the Cowichan First Nations peoples say is a direct rip-off of their centuries old self copyright design and artwork, both of which defines them as a culture and a people!

HMMMM, lets see.  Copyright infringement for the 2010 Olymp*c Committee and the defensive position of why the Hudson Bay Company is allowed to manufacture Cowichan style clothing the Cowichan people see as a clear copyright infringement.

Below is the Hudsons Bay's "PR Wonks" explaination to Canadians as to what makes their clothing different from Cowichan First Nations. Now Public Readers can decide for themselves.

Question: Is not your design a rip-off of Cowichan design?

HBC PR Response: Our designers were inspired by great Canadian stories and Canadian fashion icons that reach from coast to coast to coast. We are very proud of our heritage including our First Nations peoples and wanted to reflect our rich history as both a country and a company in a design that will represent Canada on the world stage as well as appeal to Canadians.

So you can see, Now Public readers, the tepid, legal arguement used in their crossed-eyed response to the public.

Now, imagine if the Cowichan First Nations were to act in the same manner as our Provincial Liberal Government, against ordinary citizens who dare even wear a Cowichan clothing style copy.  Imagine this scenario below!

If Cowichan First Nations were to walk up to a tourist or citizen of British Columbia on the street, who were wearing clothing with the First Nations Cowichan's perceived illegally copyrighted artwork icons displayed, but made by the Hudson's Bay Company, and the Cowichan peoples promptly ripped it off the backs of these people!

Or another scenario. What if a Cowichan walking down the street noticed one of their logos displayed in your window, perhaps drawn by your 4th grade child in art class. Imagine now, if this First Nation Cowichan entered your home, guns ablazing, took hold of you at gunpoint and ransacked your private domain because your child drew a picture of an Elk which looked identical to Cowichan's cultural design and artwork. What do you think would happen, I wonder? 

I mean, if our Liberal Provincial Government is allowed to do the exact same thing in protecting this Olymp*c organization's copyright, it only seems fair that the Cowichan First Nations can do the same!

I tell you what would happen!

The British Columbia Government would swoop down and show the Cowichan First Nations a combination of a Ruby Ridge, mixed with an Iraqi style "Shock and Awe Campaign" wiping the Cowichan Peoples off the map! 

This "Shock and Awe Ruby Ridge Action", courtesy of those like the Hudson Bay Company, Olymp*c sporting organization and the British Columbia Liberal Government. All three I assume who feel copyright infringement  resides with those who have the most money and political pull.

As for First Nations, it seems this Liberal  Government, and perhaps the Hudson's Bay Company feel the First Nations Cowichan can just "Piss Off on the Longboats they paddled in on", be quiet, or else.  Stop the whining cause who knows, there may still be a few of them smallpox contaminated blankets in the back storeroom somewhere and winters a coming.

So Now Public, you can see why I am claiming Copyright of “Common Sense”!

Because, one day and one day soon, people all over the world will one day wake up and “YELL WE NEED SOME FU*KIN COMMON SENSE!”

And guess what people? I own it! So till then, I will bide my time and wait for my Freedom 55 to kick in, and when “Common Sense” is in Demand, I will be “Rich” –“Bill Gates Rich”, I tells ya!

As I rake in all them royalties and retire on a beach far, far away from everyone!

I’ll be Rich I tells Ya, Rich!