NBC ID's Disappeared has disappointed me once again!

Hurt me once, shame on you. Hurt me twice, shame on me. 

SO I GUESS IT WAS MY FAULT FOR TRUSTING THEM. 

The PI from Las Vegas Private Detectives, Mike Kirkman has suddenly become too scared to talk to the crew for an episode on Jessie's case - even though he agreed in the beginning and they got all our hopes up.

So then I get a call from the producer today and he says, YA, MIKE IS RIGHT. WE HAVE ALSO HEARD FROM THE POLICE IN METRO & OTHERS WHO WORK HERE HOW DANGEROUS PETER TODD IS . . . then all I heard was BLAH, BLAH, BLAH.

What he was saying was that if the PI is not willing to talk then they can't do the show. I told him that even more than ever I am that I am very glad we only kept Kirkman for a few weeks, since he was such a scaredy-cat. Who wants a private investigator who is afraid? Not me. Don't get me wrong. I don't want to endanger anyone - but if he is afraid of the people he is investigating, then he needs to find another job, because this is obviously not his line work.

Anyways, I cut him off and said, don't bother going on and on with some long explanation if you are not going to do it, then whatever. I am so sick and tired of giving myself to people like you (I spoke for hours on the phone with him and others; I sent them info and pictures and people to contact and so much more – oh well! Whatever . . . ) over and over all for nothing. I relive it every time and you go - NOPE, NOT GONNA TO IT. I even told him that I hope what I do to bring awareness, attention and education about human trafficking helps someone he knows one day (okay, so I am dramatic, what can I say?)!!!

I also thanked him for trying and told him not to worry - that I, a nearly 54-year-old grandma will continue. Then I told him I had to go, that I had to try to find my daughter and I hung up.

Seriously though, I truly don't want anyone else to be in danger and I get that they are scared. But then do a story about her disappearance and her family looking high and low and her mother trying to educate people about this horrific crime of human trafficking. Don't do it where you have to expose Peter Todd as the violent pimp and possible/likely human trafficker that he is. Do it from another way.

OH WAIT. That won't get them ratings. Our life, without the horrible criminals that are literally IN MY LIFE, is just not ratings-worthy. So, sorry for making you cry for 3 or 4 hours. Sorry for getting Crystal to find a flight for you to book so she can come to Kamloops at your beck & call. WHATEVER.

So, for the 2nd time, DISAPPEARED got my hopes up, just to let me crash back down. THANK YOU BIG SHOT PRODUCERS AND EXECUTIVES. I pray that your TOPICS never become anyone of your REALITIES!!!

DON'T WORRY JESSIE, MOMMY WILL NEVER GIVE UP ON YOU!