President's Day Ahead Schedule

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“December 31, 2009

The Day Ahead: December 31,2009
Good Morning,

President Obama and his family continue their holiday stay in Hawaii.  There are no public events on the schedule at this time. 

The President continues to receive a series of daily briefings regarding the attempted Detroit jet liner terror attack and national security.

Today is the deadline for the preliminary review of airline safety and intelligence surrounding the incident that the President called for earlier this week.

According to the President, the reviews began on Sunday.  He said it was, "essential that we diagnose the problems quickly and deal with them immediately."

More "comprehensive, formal reviews and recommendations for improvement" will continue through the coming weeks, added Mr. Obama in remarks on Tuesday.”'

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Good Morning,

Osama bin Laden and his closest friends and allies are spending the day in a cave in Pakistan, just across the border from Afghanistan. The only scheduled events today are to obtain reports about successful raids and bombings against the USA and their allies whereby we are monitoring their moves and deploying our human bombers into position.

Osama is reading the papers about Obama’s vacationing and is very sorry to disturb his pleasantness, but we are at war you know?