Santa Claus Killing Victims Remembered in California

Hundreds of people packed a California church Friday for the funeral of nine family members killed at a Christmas Eve party by a relative dressed as Santa.

No coffins were on display at the Holy Name of Mary Catholic Church in San Dimas. Instead, photos of the victims were displayed on easels.

The nine bodies were found shot and burned after Bruce Pardo burst into the party and started killing people before setting the house on fire and eventually killing himself.

He killed his ex-wife Sylvia Pardo, her parents Joseph and Alicia Ortega, and six family members.

A frequently asked question regarding victims in abusive relationships is "why don't they just leave?" While it seems a simple enough way to end the abuse, the reality is that leaving a violent/abusive relationship is anything but simple. 

Leaving an abusive relationship does not guarantee an end to the abuse; rather, the abuse often escalates at the time of separation.  The majority of domestic violence murder-suicides occur after the victim has tried to leave the relationship.  The fact that many victims do leave or seek help is truly remarkable in light of the many barriers they face.  Some of these include: 

• lack of awareness of services 
• fear of retaliation by the batterer 
• lack of financial resources fear of losing custody of the children *fear of
•  not being believed 
• religious, family and societal pressures 
• shame 
• denial of seriousness of abuse 
• belief that the batterer will change 
• lack of support network 
• cultural and ethnic/racial barriers 

Despite the many obstacles faced by victims, people continue to ask "why don't they just leave?"  It is time for us to change the dialogue.  Instead of placing the burden on the victim to get out of the abusive relationship, it is time that we shift the focus to the person responsible - the abusive partner.  Instead of asking why the victims will not leave, it is time that we ask instead, "why do people abuse and why is it allowed to continue?"