Should Obama Kill Casey Anthony?

You know you’ve been thinking it, too. Plummeting polls, plummeting stock market, a debt deal that disappointed the entire political spectrum…even charges that Michelle eats junk food when no one, well, maybe one hidden camera, is looking…

How can he bring back the magic? Remember back to, oh—May 2nd, to be exact--when Obama sent in the Navy Seals to kill Osama Bin Laden and they did? He was unbeatable, a shoo-in for 2012. All the pundits said so.

Even Fox News had to admit it. Republicans who’d been lining up to challenge The President were quaking in their boots. Hillary Clinton, who’d been expecting to be drafted for 2012, had to cover her mouth in astonishment as she watched the Navy Seal footage…and pretend later it was her allergies she was stifling. Obama’s poll numbers actually went up for once, all the way to 56%. Nine points higher than a month earlier…and 16 or so points higher than now. That was the good old day.

He might gain back a point or two by taking out Khadafi, but you can’t kill the country’s number one enemy a year and a half before the election and then expect to reignite the glory by taking out somebody so far down the terrorist totem pole.

No, he needs a target everybody can get behind. Somebody whose comeuppance can make us all proud to be Americans again:

• Fidel Castro? Is he even still alive?

• Charlie Sheen? Could be sued for copyright violation, since CBS already announced plans to kill off his character in the first episode of the season.

• And OJ Simpson is so 1994. But there is one liar-murderer-ex-mom who desperately needs to re-invent herself, and, if she doesn’t find a way soon, she’ll end up celebrity-wrestling Octomom and ex-figure skater-slash-knee basher Tonya Harding, with a portion of the proceeds going to some local charity.

This looks to be a win for both sides. There’s nothing like martyrdom to make everybody regret saying those awful things about you. And nothing like a well-deserved assassination to get out the vote.